


Sincerely Yours, Angel Cake

by Sk3tch



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Aziraphale's Bookshop (Good Omens), Bookshop Owner Aziraphale (Good Omens), Do not repost, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Florist Crowley (Good Omens), Ineffable Idiots (Good Omens), Love Letters, M/M, Matchmaker Anathema Device, Mutual Pining, POV Multiple, Pen Pals, Rating May Change, Tags May Change
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-18
Updated: 2020-06-18
Packaged: 2021-03-04 02:00:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,572
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24795820
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sk3tch/pseuds/Sk3tch
Summary: When Aziraphale Fell agreed to sign up for a pen pal service, he expected to receive letters. What he didn’t expect was a very suggestive proposition in his first exchange. Of course, had Aziraphale known The Besought Jollyglot was actually a dating service, he probably wouldn’t have let Anathema sign him up in the first place. Well, nothing to do but make the best of an awkward situation. In the very least, it’ll take his mind off of the new shop owner across the street. The one with hair as red-hot and fussy as his attitude, with the unnatural propensity to annoy Aziraphale every time he opens his mouth. Yes, at least his pen pal has some style.Unbeknownst to them, bookshop owner Aziraphale Fell and his trouble-making florist neighbor Anthony Crowley get matched on an anonymous pen pal service that is more than meets the eye. In real life, they’re ready to throttle each other; on paper, they’re slowly growing besotted.
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Comments: 39
Kudos: 76
Collections: Good AUmens AU Fest





	Sincerely Yours, Angel Cake

**Author's Note:**

> A HA! My entry for the Good AUmens event! A special, GIGANTIC Thank you to [Liquid_Lyrium](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Liquid_Lyrium/pseuds/Liquid_Lyrium) for betaing!! When I threw out a bat signal they swooped in and saved me big time. <3
> 
> Thank you, thank you, thank you!!

“Sexual proclivities?! Now I know you said this was thorough, but honestly,” Aziraphale said looking up at Anathema, who for the life of him seemed very nonplussed by the comment, “how is _this_ necessary for a pen pal service?” Anathema considered his question and smiled that lazy smile she used when she was up to something, but Aziraphale knew not what.

“The world is a different place than what it was 20 years ago you know. Not everything ends in ‘full stops’ anymore. Now, I know you’re used to homing pigeons,” Aziraphale let out an uncouth snort and she smiled with more genuine emotion, “but we want our delivery system to be as good as it can be, and that meant retiring birds after the war. Finding good counterparts for people works the same way. To get a really good match we have to be as in depth as possible with the personality profiles, that’s all.” Aziraphale gave her a searching look over his glasses, but she simply sipped the tea he made for her and didn’t comment further. 

Well he supposed, that did more or less seem reasonable. There wasn’t much worse than trying to carry on a conversation with someone you had nothing in common with. And, he thought as he checked the LGBTQ+ option, it certainly didn’t do to match up anybody who would oppose each other over their own fundamental core values. Things _had_ come a long way in 20 years. People, for example, were way more open about themselves now. 

Hell, just last year Aziraphale had put up ‘safe zone’ stickers on his business door, something he might not have advertised or openly associated himself with when he was younger. So, if they were asking after his sexual preferences on a form for a pen pal, he had to admit the world really must have changed. And under his nose no less. 

He imagined that was bound to happen to people who never left their flat or their shop save for visiting the local eateries and museums. He shrugged his defeat and continued answering the questionnaire Anathema brought, trying not to blush as he consciously knew she’d be personally reading over the answers later to match him up with someone in the pen pal database. 

He looked at the company’s name on the paper again and shook his head, who would have thought? _The Besought Jollyglot_. 

Actually, he was surprised Anathema had brought an application over for him. Yes, in the past he’d mentioned he thought the pen pal service was interesting from Anathema’s descriptions of it, talking about clients being matched and sending written letters to their intended recipients. ‘Some even fall in love, as Hallmark as that is,’ she quipped at one point with a scoff, causing them both to chuckle. 

The idea of finding love with a stranger through words on paper did make his hopeless literary heart sing in all honesty, though. It was more than a bit old fashioned and he could easily see how it would lend itself to a romantic flair. Aziraphale would be lying if he said he didn’t like the idea of the service, romantic pursuits aside. The nostalgia it brought back to him of when he’d written long letters in his youth to friends and relatives was powerful.

But that conversation had been ages ago, when Anathema was still only a child. Well, as much as a 16 year old can be considered a child these days. She’d been helping with her family’s pen pal service, picking up several old books Aziraphale had on letter writing from the 18th century he was willing to part with, when she first stepped in his shop. The two had somehow hit it off after that first interaction, with her visiting the shop every time she was over from America seeing family. Then once she decided to make the permanent move to England to head the business office located there, she visited more often than not. Odd as it was, given their age difference and their own obscure interests, they were good friends. 

He found himself quite charmed by the young woman, and often followed her unprompted advice. She had been the one to mention the sticker for his door to alert the LGBTQ+ population in the area (and queer youth in particular) that his shop was a judgement free safe place, as well as the one who said he should let Tracy do tarot readings and host a spicy book club in the shop every 3rd Thursday of the month. Those were just two of the most impactful suggestions of dozens she had made. Anathema’s ideas were always sound, good for Aziraphale’s business, but there was still one suggestion he never fully got on board with. 

She had tried for many times to get him to sign up for the company her ancestor founded back in the 1600’s, but every time he’d politely brushed her off or otherwise been inconvenienced in other ways. He didn’t mean to be rude, but he was very busy. Not only was the shop always seeming to expand and need constant re-cataloging, Aziraphale’s little hobby of restoring old books had somehow garnered critical attention. He was regularly getting calls to work on this, or if he would sell that; he didn’t have the time to properly commit to writing another human being, it wouldn’t have been fair to them. Now however… anyway, she hadn’t asked him in some years’ time, and truth be told he thought he wouldn’t hear about it again, sometimes even forgetting that she was the heir to such an enterprise. 

But when Anathema showed up on this perfectly ordinary day with a questionnaire profile under arm as well as several copies of her newfangled, though Aziraphale would never call them such out loud in front of her, magazines that she loved to read on her lunch breaks — Aziraphale had felt tickled and something in him said ‘oh why not,’ he had nothing on. So he agreed to fill one out. Besides, maybe it would be a good distraction. 

Much like it seemed things were changing outside the walls of the ancient bookshop, things inside were changing too, albeit at a slower pace. Books just weren’t the same sought after commodity they used to be. Yes, he still was getting revenue from the odd window shopper here and there and Tracy’s group was almost always a guaranteed 20 book purchase, but the shop was quiet. Which had never bothered him much before, it was in those long stretches of quiet he was typically his most productive, and yet...

The truth was, Aziraphale did not have many friends, and he was, at his core, a bit lonely. A pen pal really would be nice, and make for perhaps more stimulating conversation, even if it was only through paper. Although, he thought amusedly, Anathema was quick to point out the changes in pen-palship that had also become available in the last half century.

“We have an online set-up too. There’s a whole app people can use instead of sending snail mail.” Aziraphale, ever the purist, had laughed and checked his preference into the paper only correspondences option right after.

“Besides being an eyesore, I much prefer a handwritten note over the impassive facade of technology.” Anathema let the comment hang for five minutes before asking point blank if it was actually because he didn’t own a computer or a smartphone. He deflected, saying paper was like air to him and the written word akin to breathing in a way electronic messages could never hold a candle to, but it was obvious she wasn’t convinced that was the entire truth and rolled her eyes.

“Whatever luddite! I’m just saying we have it, and Gods willing you ever change your mind about technology, there might come a day you’ll want to try it! Lucky for you, the option will still be there when you do come down off your high horse.” Aziraphale, knowing how it would read, did his utmost not to sniff at that comment, and instead settled for a sulk. She let the subject drop though, and he went about finishing the application in the gentle quiet thereafter; the silence only interrupted by the occasional sound of pages turning in _The New Aquarian_.

***

Of course, it didn’t take much longer, as there were only three pages for him to fill out, but Aziraphale kept rearranging the papers and going over his answers to make sure it said exactly as he wanted and it was making Anathema antsy. As readily as he had agreed to finally give it a go, he now seemed to be second guessing his decision, and she didn’t want him to back out now, not when she was so close to being able to match him up!

Finally, after a second cup of tea and the assurance that she did not have enough time to stick around for delivery, no matter how scrumptious, Aziraphale sat up a little straighter and shuffled through the papers one last time, making sure everything on the application was complete. After she saw him take his glasses off, she struck. He looked up for a second to address her and Anathema quickly reached out and snatched the pages, lest he change his mind in the next minute or inescapably notice anything off about them.

“I’ll take those.” She grabbed the three pages and stuffed them into one of her magazines for safe keeping, tucking it close to her chest. She didn’t check first to make certain everything was filled in as it should be, she knew it would be. And besides, anything he might’ve missed, Anathema was sure to be able to guess. He lifted a single brow, but otherwise seemed to excuse her behavior.

“Alright then,” she said in a rush, “I suppose, I’d better head back to the office.” She got up from her seat in a flash, and Aziraphale blinked quickly, getting up to walk her to the door. She waved him off, thanking him for the tea and told him to watch his post.

“Oh, oh yes, I will Anathema! I confess, I wasn’t excited before, but I think you’ve finally won me over. I’m excited for a pen pal!” His shoulders wiggled with the thought and Anathema bit her lip, feeling only for a moment not very good.

 _The Besought Jollyglot_ had indeed started as a simple pen pal communication service in the 1600’s, but somewhere along the way in the first century or so of operation, it had discreetly broadened its charter to also become the world’s first dating service, pairing soulmates via letters. Thanks to a pairing algorithm of sorts Agnes left to her son, the success rate of those matches were absurdly high and reliable. _The Besought Jollyglot_ still used the core principles from that first system in their matching done today. They also still had the option of only looking for a pen pal friend instead of a romantic pursuer of course, but that was by far the less popular option now, and also a different form.

The fact Aziraphale had no clue the company did anything besides platonic pen pals, was astounding given how much history he knew. But it also wasn’t something she was going to correct him on, either.

And if Anathema Device had ‘accidently’ ripped off the corner of this application that read ‘find your soulmate’ then who would be the wiser. Well, Aziraphale would find out sooner or later, but that was a problem for future her. When he did find out, he could always cancel his profile, and Anathema would make sure to scrub any evidence of his involvement with the company. But… well, anyone who knew him, really truly knew him, could tell he was lonely. 

Anathema saw it every time she left from visiting his shop; the want to not be left alone clear in his eyes even as he smiled through his farewell, and that hurt to see. Someone who was so funny, and caring, and bursting with love ought to have someone to share it all with.

Although Anathema tried not to pry into the lives of her friends and play matchmaker, even if she did have an eerily accurate sixth sense in matching people up to one another better sometimes than the algorithms, she didn’t like to meddle.Contrary to some people’s opinion, she tried to keep her nose out of other people’s business. 

But, after Anathema had taken a chance on her family’s system due in large part to her mother’s constant nagging, and got paired with Newt (who later joined the company to help test bug fixes and their supposed patches), she had to admit there was something about it. The BJ really could help people. Not that she had been unhappy being single, but she was so much _happier_ after how it ended up for her. And with all of the testimony of the couples it worked for in the past and continued to work for, she had an instinctual gut feeling Aziraphale should sign up too. 

Not that he needed a partner, he was a strong independent man that didn’t need a man, but.. God, maybe Anathema was getting soft, but she could confess it was nice to have a confidant. It was nice to have someone unerringly on your side supporting you and your decisions, while also being the voice of reason when yours got buried. She shrugged, the sex was a nice bonus, too.

Yes, Aziraphale _needed_ to sign up.

She hadn’t known when to give it a renewed try to broach the subject again, she’d been trying for several years and had backed off for the last few to give room for the idea to percolate with him, but when a picture of them, Aziraphale and her, had landed on top of a memo at work that day leaving only the phrase ‘Now is the time’ visible, who was she to ignore fate? It was clearly time to take action for Aziraphale, so she acquired an empty questionnaire from the lobby and left for Aziraphale’s an hour later to have him fill it out over lunch. Somehow, this time she knew it in her very core, he wouldn’t say no.

The fact that the memo was a yearly reminder for employees to check the fire alarms in their offices, was inconsequential. The universe had sent it’s message and Anathema Device was listening.

He might be mad when he finally figured it out, but she could live with a little bit of righteous wrath. Besides, of all the options available, this was perfect for Aziraphale. It was almost exactly tailored to his specific tastes. Everything was about as anonymous as it came. No names, no pictures, just messages. Even those were screened by technicians too, and while Anathema found that to be a bit too much sometimes, it had its merits. There had been a few conservative attempts to hack their system to try and hurt their clients, both under accusations of actual witchcraft being done in their company and because they were so LGBTQ+ friendly. Since they didn’t quite have the software yet to stop every single one of those attacks, although there was a big update being worked on that was promising, this was the next best thing.

Anathema took a moment to smooth out her long skirt at the door before shuffling her papers under her arm. She threw open the door a second later, looking over her shoulder to shout out a goodbye, but Aziraphale’s form was already shuffling back through his shelves with a cart of books in tow. She smiled and jumped through the doorway, as was her tradition, and promptly ran into someone with a grunt, spilling her magazines and their contents all over the pavement.

“Eugch, watch it book girl!”

“Anathema.”

“Crowley.”

“Bastard.”

“One and only,” he said dryly before tugging open the door and rolling inside sinuously. Anathema shook her head, already feeling for Aziraphale who would have to deal with that man, who had been dealing with that man for several months now, and stooped down to collect her magazines. 

On the top page of the first magazine she picked up, Anathema was disappointed to see the corner had bent when it fell. She went to un-dogear the page, when the phrase ‘appearances lie!’ caught her attention. It was directly under the turned flap, and no other words surrounded the phrase. Undoing it, she saw the whole phrase: ‘Snakes are trustworthy, appearances lie!’ and felt herself hum as she smoothed it out. 

If she were less attuned to the way the universe worked, she might have smoothed the page over, settled herself, and been on her way, not giving it any more thought. But Anathema was not less attuned, and had a tickling feeling by way of intuition this was just as important for her to notice as the photo of Aziraphale and her falling down earlier had been.

It was rare to receive one message from the universe, let alone two in the same day Anathema mused. But again, who was she to not listen to the universe? Lost in thought, she was walking back to the office before she realized she was moving, head still ruminating on what this new… prophecy of sorts, might mean. 

***

Aziraphale had just wheeled his cart of misprinted Bibles into the backroom to do some cataloging when he heard the crash. It wasn’t a terribly loud sound, like that of a car wreck, but it was enough sound deviating from the usual sweet tinkle of the bell above his door to tell him something had happened. Concerned about Anathema, perhaps she had tripped, Aziraphale hurried back out to see if she needed help. What he saw through the glass made him stop in his tracks and stare.

He could see two people standing on the stoop to his shop. Anathema had her back to the door, and Aziraphale could just make out the magazines on the ground by her feet. Ah. Immediately he could guess what must have happened, as this wouldn't be the first time. The sweet, quirky person that Anathema was, had an unusual exit ritual whenever she left Aziraphale’s shop. Something about good fortune and intentions. Well, she must have done as she usually did, but failed to notice the other person making their way into the shop, subsequently crashing into them on her way out.

And of all the people for her to crash into, it had to be him. Of course it did. Aziraphale felt helpless to do anything but watch as his red-haired shop neighbor Anthony J. Crowley seemed to growl at one of his closest friends before yanking the door open and barging in. Anathema didn’t appear hurt as she bent down and picked up her things, pausing for the briefest of moments as she smoothed down the covers before taking off in the direction of her job. He watched her go, until the clearing of a throat made him have to face the new occupant in his shop. With falling shoulders, he turned and met scowl for scowl, the man who was almost as bad as the bookstore chain trying to buy his store.

 _Brimstone Books_. 

Aziraphale wrinkled his nose at the thought of the company and tried to shake it off, but the weariness of dodging their persistent representatives and the plethora of calls and letters from them with the hopes that he would eventually wear down and sell left Aziraphale unable to put forth even that much more mind power to push it from his head.

It was true that his shop wasn’t doing as well as it had in the past, but that was presumably more to the fact that he didn’t like to part with the books some customers wanted to purchase. Those that were more for display than sale, or the ones in his private collection. He was also being more particular about private commissions on restorations. But even though his business had slowed, that didn’t mean he was going to sell his shop.

The throat cleared again and Aziraphale jumped. Right...

“Ah yes, sorry. What could I do for you Anthony?” The man in front of him clicked his tongue and poked at a stack of books on the edge of the nearest shelf.

“Crowley,” he grumbled and Aziraphale nodded, but otherwise stayed silent. “Yeah, anyway, just thought I’d stop in, see if you had changed your mind?” He looked up as he pushed one book further in on the shelf, as if daring Aziraphale to tell him off for his devious rearranging. Again, Aziraphale held his voice and waited, watching as the man got more fidgety by the minute the longer he didn’t give him attention.

“Anth- Crowley, if I’ve told you once and I know I have, then I've told you probably a hundred times over. I am not selling my shop. Now, it doesn’t matter to me if you want to sell your inheritance, but I am quite attached to my bookstore and don’t plan on doing any such thing, ever. And,” he continued perhaps a bit too loudly after seeing a rogue plant mister in Crowley’s apron press dangerously close to dousing his shelf in a wet mist, “I would very much appreciate it if you would stop trying to sway me on my choice!” 

He had stepped forward when he spoke, and took Crowley by the shoulders to move him a foot to the left so the other’s disposition to lean on things didn’t ruin his inventory. But when he looked up, a single brow was raised above those infuriating glasses Crowley always had on and Aziraphale felt his own cheeks blush as the outburst made him feel like he was the instigator trying to cause trouble, and it wasn’t the other way around. To make matters worse, his hands were still on Crowley’s shoulders.

He dropped them immediately to wring in front of him. He did not apologize though, as he hadn’t done anything wrong. Well, besides breeching the other’s personal space. His face reddened more as Crowley continued to stare, tongue caught between his teeth as he appeared to be catching up on what had just happened the same as Aziraphale.

“Sorry,” Aziraphale said and hated how genuine it felt, “but your mister was-” he pointed to a spot on the shelf where a few rogue drops had fallen. Crowley took in a breath through his teeth and nodded.

“Oh, right, yeah, guess I am too. I, I didn’t mean to moisten your stock.” He shrugged, and the small look of requited apology flitted off his face as he once again plastered on that cheeky smirk. “Anyway, you haven’t changed your mind then, not even a little? Can’t be tempted?” Aziraphale shot him a look and frowned, out of patience.

“I am not selling my shop Anthony.” Crowley’s smirk fell at the use of his first name, and Aziraphale felt a little bit more in control. The other had been getting under his skin from the very moment he took up shop across from him. Well, maybe not the first day, when Aziraphale hadn’t yet introduced himself to the other, but as soon as names had been exchanged, it had been hell.

They had clashed from the very get go, and Aziraphale had long since given up hope of ever salvaging that could-have-been friendship. That, coupled with Crowley all but handing over his business to the _Brimstone’s_ legal team, had only further divided them. Crowley might not care about his shop, or the community that lived in this area, but Aziraphale did. And who knew what would happen if _Brimstone_ got their way. Probably bulldoze the area, that’s what. No, Aziraphale would not budge, even if, no, even _though_ he was the last to accept an offer. 

“Alright then your _principality_ ,” Crowley mocked, “I suppose my ‘thwart Aziraphale time’ is up. I have plants that need a talking to anyway.” And before Aziraphale could question that turn of phrase, he was out of the bookstore and strolling across the street through traffic, disappearing into his small flower shop.

Aziraphale clucked his tongue, and after a deep fuming sigh, strode the short distance over to flip the closed sign with a little too much force. That was one thing he could always count on Crowley for, spoiling his mood. 

When he turned around and his eyes fell on his cart of Bibles he had been looking forward to going through, he found he now wanted nothing more than to curl in with a good cuppa and some comforting Agatha Christie.

For the briefest of moments, he thought about calling Anathema and seeing if she was okay, and then to tell her about the newest bout with Crowley. But after a glance at the clock, he realized her lunch break had only just ended, and while she did have a large reign over her work hours, he didn’t want to make her look bad in front of her co-workers. 

He then thought about calling Tracey, but she was still away for her ‘psychic workshop’. Suddenly, Aziraphale felt very glad indeed that a mere hour ago he had finally agreed to sign up for a pen pal. It would be nice to have an impartial friend to discuss his woes and joys with in moments like these. 

Yes, very glad. 

***

A few hours later and several blocks over, Anthony Crowley had long since closed his shop for the day and was settling in for the night at his flat. He was currently filling out a rather dull _Besought Jollywhosits_ questionnaire of his own. The difference between him and a certain bookshop owner being that he knew exactly what he was getting into, so to speak. Unlike someone being tricked by a friend, he knew this service wasn’t just for sending letters and making besties. He was painfully aware of the cutesy little hearts circling the words ‘find your soulmate’ visible at the top of every newly loaded page of his application.

But what else was he going to do? Right now, his life consisted solely of going to work and coming back, and nothing else. Crowley would never admit this aloud, but he was listless. Ever since the shop fell into his hands, and he’d fallen out of grace at his supposed-to-be final adult job, he was just floating through life. It didn’t help that he was single as all get out, the wrong side of forty, and more often than not bored by long stretches of time where he only had himself as entertainment. Maybe, he thought, just maybe someone else could fill that gap, and he could be _happy_ again. 

Or some approximation similar to that, anyway.

And while he didn’t know if this service would work, he had already tried many, many like it, he figured he could still give it a try. What was one more? He finished the last question and hit submit, appreciating how automated everything was, not even needing to leave his flat. Although, he thought, looking up from his laptop to the direction of his kitchen where he could picture his overflowing sink full of dishes, he could probably use something to eat. 

Not that he had anything lying around however, he hadn’t made it to the shops after work, completely forgetting he had planned to do so. And as if sponsored by his thoughts, his stomach gave a loud growl at the reminder of his empty pantry. Sighing, Crowley opened a new browser tab to order some take away.

***

Coincidentally, at the same time an order of Thai food was being delivered to a Mayfair flat, Anathema Device had also been thinking about dinner. About how much she wanted to go home and eat it. But, due to several unlucky happenstances at work that were unfortunately all Newt-rooted, the systems were only just now coming online. Dealing with the folks who had been in the middle of tentative conversations, or who had dates when the power outage occurred and were rightfully mad seemed neverending, but there was only so much she could do in one night.

When most of her damage control was done, Anathema sighed, checked the clock again, and then opened a new program on her computer. She was determined to get Aziraphale’s information into the database tonight, another total system shutdown notwithstanding. The sooner he was in there, the sooner someone who was compatible with him would match. It was science, _and_ common sense.

Granted it may still take a while once he was in the system, some people went months before an appropriate match came through, the longest wait a person ever had with Anathema on the job had been three weeks. She was good at what she did, seeing the minutest amount of data correlation in applications and being able to match them well enough, sometimes even before the computer finished it’s algorithm.

Smiling to herself, she hit the enter key fifteen minutes later after everything looked to be correctly entered, and went to refill her travel tumbler with fresh coffee, giving her sulking partner a soft kiss on the forehead in her wake where he sat at the break room table nursing his own mug.

Her main computer screen was still running it’s application so, sitting back down, she pulled up Aziraphale’s file on her second computer monitor and started doing her own side by side comparison between Aziraphale and other suitable… suitors. The pool was already cut in half to those looking for a male identifying/male identifying relationship since Aziraphale was a happily out gay man. Although that wasn’t really saying much, the BJ’s highest demographic worldwide was the LGBTQ+ community, but it did cut down some of the time. 

And after a few more filters were in place, Anathema cracked her knuckles and got to work.

Her fingers flew over the keyboard as she sorted through the data points she found most likely to bring a good match for her friend, and clicked through the database of availability. No, no, no, GOD NO, and the list went on. She paused to grab her coffee just as her main computer dinged to announce it’s perfect match. Rolling her chair over, she stared at the results and nodded. It did seem like a good match. There were a few odd things that weren’t quite perfect which was to be expected, but for the most part it looked okay. She would of course make a note of this and continue her own match attempt like she always did.

She scrolled up to jot down the name before she ran the system a second time to see if a different person might come out on top and nearly dropped her mug when she saw the name. Oh no, she thought, no way! There was simply no way _he_ could have been paired with Aziraphale. The prospect of him even applying to be part of the _Besought Jollyglot_ database, looking for love, was too much. She snorted, but as she did her eyes caught the body modification checklist and saw his answer about tattoos. Then she did drop her coffee.

“Shit!” She said quickly, picking up the mug where it had bounced on the carpet. Luckily, only a small bit escaped, and it wouldn’t even be noticeable against the dark shade. Anathema’s breath came out in a relieved sigh, the sound immediately recognizable to any overworked person reaching their limit, and she shook her head.

Once her coffee was situated, corded off to the side of her desk far away from the electronics and paperwork all around her, she sat back in her chair and stared again at the results from the computer’s initial trial. 

A snake tattoo.

That’s what had thrown her, a snake tattoo! In the description box it said not only was the owner of this survey okay with body modifications such as piercings and tattoos, but that he had one. A _snake_ tattoo. Briefly, the message from her magazine cover flooded her senses and she couldn’t help but see it all over again. 

‘ _Snakes are trustworthy, appearances lie!_ ’

Anathema steepled her fingers and sat with them under her chin for some time as she contemplated everything. This...had to be a fluke, there was no way it could possibly… Anathema bit her lip.

Well… it wouldn’t hurt to do another run through, either way. That was how she liked to do it usually, so there was no reason not to. The computer oftentimes gave a different match the second go around anyway, and when it did it was always up to the technician assigned the case to go over each one with a fine tooth comb to pick the best possible match. This was how they trained their new employees to find matches, so she would go about it that way too, in addition to her own proven tactics. 

Deciding with a nod, she cleared out the results and set Aziraphale’s application up to run a second time. After this, then she would know. At least, once she finished her own analysis, then she would know. She wheeled back to face her other workstation and set to finishing that before the main program could complete its second run through.

She had a few that were promising, but just not all the way there, ultimately. Not that star signs were something that was standard in their program any longer, but Anathema knew it could play a part. She looked at the numbers and saw there were still roughly 200 applicants to go through. 

_Ding!_

She turned to the main computer again, pulling her hair back into a full bun to finish out the night with, and felt her eyes bulge behind her glasses. No…. she didn’t want to believe it, but there again, the supposed perfect match was Aziraphale’s daily annoyance from the last two months. Anathema licked her lips, and with a quick decision, pulled the power cord out of the back of the unit. A full system reboot, that would do the trick.

Unless of course there was no trick to pull and this was what should be, but Anathema tried to ignore the feeling in her gut for the sake of her friend. When he realized what she had done, she was going to be in enough trouble with him, if he ever found out she had paired him up with… him? She might have to find a new bookshop to haunt. She shuddered at that thought and after the relevant programs could be pulled up and set to run for a final time, she went back to her own method; a new determination lighting her fire to finish before the computer did for a third time with the result Anathema had a terrible foreboding about.

The numbers flashed on her screen as fast as her thoughts and she kept going. There had to be someone in the system, someone other than the petulant florist. ANYONE! Aha! This one looked promising she thought as she opened the profile into a second window to look at later and keep going through people. No, no, no… Gosh, surely there was someone?

The computer dinged a final time just as she closed out of the last possible applicant. Anathema squared her shoulders, and let out a sigh. The feeling in her gut hadn’t gone away, and as she pulled up the only applicant that had matched well with her own set of data points, it all came rushing out in a weary tone. She hadn’t looked at the name during her frenzy of clicking, and as she brought both monitors into her view, she saw they were the same.

A 98% match between Aziraphale Fell and Anthony Crowley. 

Anathema let her hands fall into her lap as her eyes went over the information. And really, the more she saw of Anthony’s answers, the more the match made sense. In real life, he was such an asshole, but on paper… well, it was like he was an entirely different person. Good with kids, likes trying new things, high ranking on the kindness scale of their personality quiz. It was day and night.

She pulled up Aziraphale’s application and started digging into the finer details. But after a few minutes it was clear this was, somehow against all odds, a very good match. Perfect even. Almost, ineffable.

Anathema sat back in her chair with her arms crossed, thinking very hard on what to do. On the one hand, she could see the stats and she could do the math in her sleep. There was a higher than usual chance that these two might actually be soulmates. On the other… she knew numbers weren’t everything, she knew how rude every interaction she’d had with the other had been. Even just today, where they’d bumped into each other. Although, that had been more Anathema’s fault that his. A sort of reactionary rudeness. Hmmm...

And then she thought about the second message, appearances lie. She looked up at the photos above her monitor, zeroing in on the one of her and Aziraphale, like she could ask his advice on this. He’d probably smile and tell her to do what she thought was best, but the problem was, what she thought was best went almost entirely against what she thought she knew.

She took her hand and dragged the mouse to hover over the reject button. If she hit that, then this match would be null and void and never again pop up for Aziraphale. The computer could run its algorithm again and find a different match that perhaps didn’t line up as well according to the numbers, but would be suitable. However, the cursor drifted over to the accept button, a single click away from matching the two men in the system and setting the ball rolling for their communication to begin, what if?

What if they did get matched? If they turned out to hate each other, it wouldn’t matter, they could apply for new matches. And if they did like each other… Well, Anathema knew Aziraphale knew she had all the details of both parties. She didn’t think he would ever ask, stickler that he was about keeping rules and privacy, but if he did she didn’t know if she could keep that secret. Not forever, anyway.

She bit her lip, and stared harder at the pixels of her monitor, willing them to shift into a third option of something she didn’t know, but hoped would be a better choice. But nothing rearranged or formed spontaneously and she was left with two equally weighted options. Match them up, or don’t. She let the cursor go between them for a while, trying to weigh her heart against each choice, but they were equal. She looked back up at Aziraphale’s smiling face in the photograph and sighed. Her mouse had rested on the one on the right when she looked at Aziraphale and found that her hand didn’t try to move anymore. Alright then, she thought heavily, this is it.

She clicked the button.

**Author's Note:**

> Wahoo! One whole chapter!
> 
> What a wild ride so far! Big Thank You goes out again to Liquid_Lyrium, as well as to the whole entity that is the GO Events Discord Server. It is filled with the nicest, wittiest, coolest people! The sheer amount of love and support there, is flooring. They've inspired me so much these last few months, and I hope every member knows how much they are appreciated! 
> 
> Also, if you're interested, you can find me on the Tumblr as [Sk3tchID](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/sk3tchid/blog/sk3tchid). You can drop me a line, any time. :)


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